Married Hookup? Best Dating Sites for Married People (Cheating & Affair Sites & Apps)
We’re all looking for our one true love, the kind that we see in movies or fantasize about. Though we may not admit it, it remains something that we hope for in the back of our minds. However, even for people who find it, or at least something akin to it, it still may not be enough. Studies have found that between 20-25 percent of married men in the US engage in extramarital sex while 10-15 percent of married women in the US have engaged in it (Munsch 2012).
Despite most people finding affairs to be immoral, a significant portion of the US population still find themselves in a marital affair, even those presumed to be happy. For those that may want to participate in an affair, for whatever reason, how are they supposed to go about finding an extramarital partner to participate in a discreet affair? Luckily, in the age of the internet, this dilemma isn’t as pressing as it once was. There is a plethora of popular adult dating platforms and dating apps specifically catered to married people. This makes it possible for married people to be able to participate in extramarital affairs. Read on to find the best dating site, hookup site, or free online resource for online daters to find this type of arrangement.
What Is an Affair?
An affair is, “a sexual relationship between two people, one or both of whom are married to someone else.” Affairs can look different depending on the people. Some people have only had a single sexual encounter with someone who wasn’t their spouse which they later regret, some may be frequent flyers when it comes to casual sex outside of their marriage, some people have affairs in which their partner knows about it, and sometimes both partners may be participating in affairs.
Whatever the case is, online dating sites have made married dating and casual sex for married individuals all the easier. Despite Oxford Languages’ definition, an affair does not always have to be sexual. Sometimes an affair is one that is emotional or romantic. Some people are simply looking for a connection that they once felt in their marriage and instead of sex are looking for comfort, companionship, or a causal relationship. A married dating site can still provide one with this type of affair.
Why Do People Cheat?
Not everyone cheats for the same reasons. Some people do it and regret it after while others do it without remorse. For some, it’s a one-time deal while others do it regularly. Sometimes there isn’t always a reason, it just happens. However, if you want to participate in an affair for any of the next few reasons, know that there are services ready to help married aspiring online daters.
Fell Out of Love
Sometimes we can simply fall out of love with someone. For some people, they can see it coming from a mile away and for others, they may just wake up realizing they don’t actually love the person they once thought they did. You may have been happily married at one point and later realized that the spark you once felt isn’t there anymore. It can’t always be explained or understood, however, this may drive someone to seek out dating services that cater to married people.
Feelings of Neglect
Life happens and at times, things may get too hectic for someone which doesn’t leave them with the time to be an active participate in their marriage like they may have been before. This can leave spouses feeling ignored or neglected which can drive them to look for that intimacy somewhere else like dating sites for married people. This option may provide them with the quick fix of love and companionship they were missing with their spouse.
Fights and Anger
What better way to hurt someone you’re in a committed relationship with than a hot date or casual sex? When marital disputes get out of hand from doing something like forgetting a birth date or anniversary and you need to blow off some steam, the only place you may be able to turn is the online dating scene.
Affair sites for married people can provide you with a safe, quick, and easy way for you to let out some of that anger after a fight or allow one to enact the revenge they think their partner deserves. Either way, it is commonly believed that you should never go to sleep angry at your spouse. So, who knows? Maybe a hookup to let out your anger is what just saves your marriage.
Sexual Desires
Sometimes, the body wants what the body wants. When you can’t get the type or frequency of sex you want, an affair dating site may set you up with what you need. If you want just one hookup or need regular casual sex, a dating platform or dating app will be very helpful in finding someone to help satisfy the needs that your partner may not be able to. Though you may not have seen yourself as someone who is into the online dating scene, this may be your best bet in getting a quick and casual hookup.
Challenges of Meeting People Outside of Marriage
Participating in a marital affair may not always seem easy. The anxieties and “what ifs?” of it all may be a deterrent when it comes to participating in an affair when one is in such a serious relationship such as marriage. However, the use of hookup sites and dating sites for married people can help you have peace of mind when it comes to the online dating scene for married individuals. By looking at some of the challenges of meeting people outside of marriage, we can better understand how a dating website can be helpful for married individuals.
Privacy Concerns
Most people looking to have an extramarital affair hope to do so privately. This may be in an effort to keep the secret from a spouse, friend, co-workers, or family. A dating service or affair site can provide you with a platform that allows you to discuss matters privately through online chats that allow for one to participate in a discreet affair worry free.
Hard to Find a Partner
It can be hard to find a partner, especially one willing to engage in illicit encounters with someone that is married. However, websites can help connect you with others who are interested and willing to engage in such activities.
Though you may find people are interested on standard adult dating sites, specifically using a married website and affair dating sites can provide you with a sure-fire way to meet people who are interested in pursuing an affair with a married man or woman.
Can’t Tell if Someone is Interested
The good thing about an online dating site is that being on it shows interest in meeting people. When it comes to wanting new sexual encounters despite your relationship status being married, affair dating sites provide a way for you to find people who actively want to participate in an affair. Using a dating service gets rid of the awkward in person encounters of trying to figure out if someone is interested in you.
Out of Practice
When it comes to being married and having been in a committed relationship for a while, many people can feel out of practice when trying to initiate a sexual encounter. The dating industry can seem daunting to those not familiar with it. However, internet dating isn’t as hard as it seems and can provide the best way for married people to get back into the dating scene.
With easy to follow instructions and millions of interested people, no matter how long you’ve been out of the game, married individuals can find a wide array of hookup sites, online dating sites, and affair dating sites ready to be used so that you can finally join the online dating world.
How to Meet Women and Men While Married
It can be hard to meet women and men while married. We all wish that it can be as simple as the meet cutes seen on television whether that is a coffee shop bump in or reaching for the last carton of eggs at the grocery store. Though this may work for some people, bumping into a casual hookup at the park isn’t the case for everyone and dating websites, specifically married dating websites, can provide the best way for a married person to find their next discreet affair.
What Can I Find?
Whether a free user or not there are many dating platforms that cater to married individuals looking to have an affair. There are gay hookup sites, straight hookups sites, and sites for those with other preferences. There are dating sites that let you access premium features and erotic videos, free online resources, paid memberships, and dating advice.
Some of the best dating sites for married people include Ashley Madison, AFF, Married Secrets, and Illicit Encounters. Even sites like Facebook Dating can provide you with the opportunity to meet other people while married. You will also find that some of the best affair dating sites cater towards male users and female users, help you find serious relationships or just casual sex, and have options to use the site completely free. Some sites even allow you to set up dating profiles that allow you to meet people in your area for casual relationships.
Taking a Risk
Internet dating doesn’t have to be daunting for married people. Sometimes, even married individuals want to spice up their personal life without their spouse involved. Luckily for many married people, there are those out there that enjoy having a married partner waiting to be found on some of the best sites.
There is a plethora of married dating sites, hookup sites, affair sites, and adult dating sites ready and waiting for those ready to engage in a secret affair. Instead of waiting for you to bump into your next hookup on the street, utilize the abundant services that cater to married individuals looking for a little something extra in their lives.
15 Best Affair Dating Sites And Apps
1. Ashley Madison
Ashley Madison is the top married dating site in the world. With 54 million profiles, Ashley Madison has the largest pool for married people who are looking for something outside of their marriage. Individuals can browse and join for free on this dating site. Also, Ashley Madison allows female users to communicate for free.
2. Victoria Milan
Victoria Milan was designed for women to be a safe, secure married dating site. With over eight million profiles, Victoria Milan boasts anonymous profiles and tools to keep your affairs private. Paid plan unlocks even more features from Victoria Milan, including a panic button in case a spouse gets too close when you’re trying to chat.
3. BeNaughty
BeNaughty is a hookup site that cuts to the chase. Users can remain anonymous on BeNaughty, but messaging other profiles requires a profile picture (which doesn’t have to be your face). Women on this dating site can subscribe to extra privacy services with a paid membership. Unlike Ashley Madison, BeNaughty claims women users outnumber their male counterparts on this married dating site.
4. Adult Friend Finder
AFF has the most activity of any married dating site with 25.5 million monthly users. It boasts more than 100 million profiles. In addition to unattached and married people looking to hookup, the dating site includes other content for women and men to browse, including erotic stories and live strip teases.
5. Seeking
For those who are married, Seeking is an dating site with great appeal. Seeking provides older, wealthy males with a pool that with more than three times as many women as it does men. Seeking provides women with a married dating site that allows the female user to post their desires and fantasies with the expectation that the men will provide free gifts or money in exchange for the date.
6. Friend Finder-X
Friend Finder-X is one of the best-known sites in America. With 1.2 million monthly users, Friend Finder-X gives users the freedom to share their fantasies in a judgment-free space. As a plus, individuals browsing Friend Finder-X aren’t forced to connect their Facebook profiles to the account to join nor required to post a photo.
7. Men Nation
Men Nation is a gay adult dating site that provides an outlet for men to explore their sexuality. In addition to married hookups, Men Nation serves as a dating site that allows gay, bisexual, or bicurious men a space to be themselves. To message other users, Men Nation does not require user to upload a photo, creating an opportunity for the adult dating site to match gay men based on other attributes than looks.
8. No Strings Attached
No Strings Attached is one of the oldest dating sites as it was founded in 1999. While individuals might find others looking for an affair, No Strings Attached is better known as a place for anonymous flirting, casual dating and hookups. Particularly, No Strings Attached caters to married women looking to live out their fantasies without fears of commitments by using a live chat or private cam feature.
9. Gleeden
Gleeden originated in France, but this popular married adult dating site has expanded across the globe in recent years. Gleeden was created by a woman looking for better adult sites than what was on the marketplace. Gleeden enhances married women’s experience with this site, putting females in control of how the affair or hookup proceeds.
10. Lesbian Personals
Speaking of ladies, Lesbian Personals is an adult dating site for women. More than two million single or attached women have created profiles on Lesbian Personals, creating one of the largest pools for married women to find matches with this platform Additionally, Lesbian Personals creates an atmosphere unique to most sites with loads of adult content and strip tease videos.
11. What’s Your Price
What’s Your Price is a dating site that is as straightforward as the name suggests. What’s Your Price caters to affluent men as they can browse profiles of women and their desired dates. What’s Your Price requires males to purchase credits, bidding for the ability to make these fantasies a reality. Men can discreetly find an online affair on What’s Your Price as males stay anonymous throughout the process.
12. Illicit Encounters
Illicit Encounters promises its users just that: a married hookup site with live chat. Since 2003, Illicit Encounters has matched locals with other users looking for an affair discreetly. Originally based out of the United Kingdom, Illicit Encounters has gained world-wide attraction and claims more than 1.5 million active users each month.
13. Grindr
Grindr is the most popular gay male dating site for men. An estimated 27 million male profiles exist on Grindr, but the average monthly user count will vary between a few million to several million each month. Grindr uses the individual’s GPS information to match users with others in their market, a feature that will impress new users. Bisexual or bicurious men can take advantage of this married dating site as anonymity remains a priority for Grindr.
14. one-night stand
The dating site one-night stand matches users looking to hookup. Boasting one of the cheaper subscription plans in this marketplace, one-night stand creates a cost-effective site for married dating. Both men and women can start off the conversation, serving as an adult friend finder for locals looking to hookup.
15. Fling.com
Fling.com is another dating site that helps men find affairs through online means. One unique aspect of Fling.com is that the site purports to remove fake profiles from its inventory daily, a feature anyone looking for online hookups would appreciate. The paid subscription allows users to share private videos, messages and photos on Fling.com, and the company states a high female-to-male ratio among active users.
Other Ways To Find Extramarital Affairs Online
RedditAs a 100% free option, Reddit offers two venues for online chatting to men and women. Reddit/r/Adultery and Reddit/r/Affairs provides users the ability to match with one another on these forums. Both the Adultery and Affairs Subreddits have more than 50,000 users that can message, chat and post without spending any money for a paid membership.
Craigslist Activities
Users know Craigslist as a classified advertisement website where online ads list individual’s unwanted items for sale and employers post their job openings. But Craigslist Activities is a personals section for the website, creating a free married dating site option. Individuals can browse the website by location, allowing users to connect with other locals looking to take an online affair into the real-world setting.
FacebookSocial media websites like Facebook are offering hundreds of groups for users to find their niche (or next affair). This also holds true for married dating as Facebook hosts dozens of communities, some even location specific, for members to hookup. While free, the drawback to Facebook is that a profile with the individual’s personal information - even fake information - exists, erasing the anonymity from married dating sites.
FeeldFeeld was started to promote ethically non-monogamous dating and has branched out from there. This site allows users to link their partner - or partners - directly to their account, giving Feeld an open-door policy when married couples start to explore their sexual boundaries. Feeld also allows the user to tailor their search options, making this one of the premier married dating sites for couples who have agreed to an open relationship.
Match.comAnother traditional dating site, Match.com provides users with access to more than 21.5 million active profiles. Members of Match.com are looking for casual dating and hookups in addition to those members who are also looking for long-term relationships. A recent estimate suggested Match.com has more than 9.2 million active monthly subscribers, making this online dating site one of the largest pools available to men looking for affairs.
ZooskZoosk is another traditional dating site available to those seeking extramarital affairs online. While most of the 27 million profiles are aged 25-34 years old, members of all age ranges take advantage of this free dating site. Paid membership provides users with the ability to directly message any profile on the site, a bonus free Zoosk membership does not include. From casual dating to married hookups, Zoosk provides its 650,000 monthly users with a variety of options to choose from.
ListCrawlerListCrawler is an escort service in the United States with multiple sites flowing into this online service. ListCrawler is billed as the top escort service in America with hundreds of advertisements posted daily by men and women looking to earn money in exchange for sex. Users of ListCrawler do not pay the website for its premium services; instead, users will be tasked with paying the escorts directly for casual dating or hookups.
Skip The Games
Skip The Games is another online dating site that is as straightforward as the name suggests. Browsing this escort service is free, but users will pay their service providers for casual dating or hookup arrangements. Billed as the second most-popular escort service in America, Skip The Games originated in Europe before earning its spot in the American escort scene.
How To Find Men To Date (Married)
Now, there are many ways one can go about finding men who are married that may be interested in dating. You can obviously do things like keeping a look out for men with kids alone in public places like parks, restaurants, or stores. However, nothing guarantees these men are married or that they are looking to be with someone. This is where online dating sites come in.
An online dating site, specifically affair dating sites, will guarantee that you’ll be meeting men interested in casual sex, a secret affair, or a casual relationship. Some of the best affair dating sites like Ashley Madison, and Adult Friend Finder will provide you with the married person you’re looking for.
Though you may be able to find married individuals on popular dating sites or a dating app like Tinder or dating websites like Facebook Dating, your best bet in finding men who are married is to go on sites catered to finding such individuals like married dating websites.
What Are You Looking For?
Depending on how serious and committed you are when it comes to finding a married man to have a casual hookup or committed relationship with, you’ll want certain things when it comes to a dating website. For example, some people may want access to erotic videos or dating advice when on a site or only want to see local dating profiles when using a married dating website. Many dating services offer free user access that allows you to use free online resources such as rooms for online chats, all completely free. However, for those serious about finding someone who is married, you may want to invest in a paid membership to a married dating site which will allow you to access premium features. No matter what you’re looking for, there are many dating platforms to find married people.
Tips for Approaching a Married Woman
Any woman on an affair site, willing to have an extramarital partner, or one you’re simply interested in but is happily in a marriage (presumably) can probably use more of the things that made her marry her spouse in the first place. So, one of the most important things you can do is provide her with the type of things that are most abundant at the beginning of a relationship. As life progresses, even the happiest of couples can lose some of the original spark that made them fall in love with each other. So, if you want to have a shot with a married woman, it’s important to approach her in a way that makes her feel that early relationship spark. This all applies whether you are on straight sites for married people or a gay hookup site.
ComplimentsOne thing you can do is compliment her. Whether in person or chatting online through a dating service, it’s important to make her feel special. As marriages progress, sometimes a woman may be missing the easy compliments she use to get in the beginning of a relationship. This can be even more disheartening as the insecurities involved with age may make this lack of compliments feel even harsher. Providing married ladies with compliments may just be what leads you to the extramarital affair you’re looking for.
ListenBe an attentive listener. When it comes to showing a married woman you’re interested, listening is key. For many women who are married, it can feel like no one is listening to her when she talks whether that is a spouse or any kids she has. So, it is important to show that you are willing to listen, whether that is during an in-person conversation or chatting over popular adult sites. If she mentions something such as her birth date or a fact about her personal life in one conversation, be sure to remember things like that so that if comes up again, it shows that you listen and pay attention to things she says.
Be a Gentleman
Who said chivalry was dead? Being married, a woman tends to miss the gentlemanly things that use to be done in earlier stages of her relationship. Her life may have slowed down to the mundane, day-to-day routines of a wife and mother. So, make sure to be a gentleman to remind her of what romance can and should be. Saying a few kind lines over an affair dating site may lead to a hot date and if you want that to be a regular occurrence instead of a one-time sexual encounter, then make sure to hold that door and pull out a chair.
Make Sure to Be a Good Time
Married or not, people don’t like being bored. When talking over dating sites, make sure to make a joke or two. Tell her about yourself and make sure she’s comfortable by not being too forward too quick. Even when on a hookup site, it is important to make her feel comfortable no matter your sexual desires because this may be her first time trying to participate in a discreet affair.
Dating Married People: Things to Keep in Mind
Obviously, dating a married person isn’t the most conventional way to go about dating. So, it’s very important to keep a few things in mind when dating someone that is married or trying it out by going into the dating scene.
You May be Found Out
When dating a married man or married woman, it is important to keep in mind that at any point in time your secret may be found out. Whether it’s friends and family or, even worse, the spouse, you must be ready to explain yourself. It takes one computer tab being left open to any married dating sites for you to be found out.
Remember Their Relationship Status
This one may be obvious, but you can’t forget that they are married. There are going to be times when they have other commitments to handle like a special occasion or children’s functions that they must attend which means cutting time with you. This may not be as important if you are only looking for a one-time thing on an affair site but if you were intending to have a long-term marital affair than you must remember to keep your cool and let your partner do what they need to do.
You Aren’t the Only One
If you are trying to pursue a serious relationship with someone who is married, just enjoy casual hook-ups with them, or just like flirting with them on internet services there will be times when you feel anxious or that what you’re doing is wrong. So, it is important to keep in mind that other people are doing what you’re doing too and that you aren’t alone. You may want to find someone else on a dating site in the same situation as you so that you can talk to them and have another person’s perspective who is in a similar boat.
It’s Okay If You Don’t Trust Them
If you met your partner on a married dating site, you know that they have no problem not being faithful to their partner. Chances are they would have no problem not being faithful to you if you two are in a serious relationship. Obviously, they are probably still seeing their spouse, however, they may still be looking on dating sites to find their next and newer married hookup. That is a reality that must be accepted so it is okay if you feel as though you don’t fully trust the person.
Tips for Encounters with Someone in a Committed Relationship
For someone adamant about pursuing a relationship with someone that is married whether you met them in-person or in the online dating world, it’s important to remember a few things for when you meet up with them.
Try Not to Go to Their House
Even if they say their spouse and kids are gone for the weekend, try to steer clear of their house because who knows, maybe the weekend gets cut short and they show up finding you in bed with their spouse. Though you should always be prepared for being found out, if you can avoid this from happening than do.
Don’t Stay Local
If you are trying to keep an extramarital affair a secret, try to stay away from places where people may know or recognize you. Even more pressing if it’s a small town, you don’t want any gossip that you were seen with someone’s spouse getting back to said spouse. Try to get out of town and go someplace less familiar. Who knows, maybe you two will find a new special spot.
Try and Steer Clear of Family Talk
Chances are that if someone is on online dating sites looking for someone to have an affair with, they don’t want to spend time talking about their spouse on a first date. Try to make conversation about life before marriage, interests and hobbies, or favorites places. Let them be able to express who they are outside of their marriage, something that they were probably looking to do by being a part of the online dating world.
Keep an Open Mind
If you are new to the online dating industry, particularly when it comes to dating a married person, you may not be used to the feelings that come with dating someone who is married. The anxiousness, the guilt, the discomfort of seeing a wedding ring on a dates finger that you didn’t provide may make you feel uneasy.
However, if this is something you want to do, it’s important to keep an open mind when it comes to dating and having feelings for people. If that person is comfortable with being on dating sites for married people and seeing someone other than their spouse, than you may as well give it a try too.
Profile Tips: Attracting Married Men and Women On Dating Sites
Creating Your Online Dating Profile
You want to stand out in the crowd. Keep all the focus on you without coming off as a narcissist. Consider only using one selfie, and add lifestyle shots that include a conversational piece. The online dating world is fun because you can keep the crowd guessing and wanting more. If you are looking to attract male users, be honest and authentic, and be specific about what you are looking for.
Profile Headlines
When it comes to online married dating you want to think about why you are there and what you are looking for, because chances are that your future married partner is thinking the same thing. Add in personality by weaving your sense of humor. If the dating site or dating app lets you pick a username, make sure it reflects an interest or passion. If you are a married man looking to attract another married person, try showing your sensitive side.
What To Expect When Dating Married Person
TrustWhen it comes to dating a married guy or women, you'll have to understand that you are not the only one and that they have probably had several sexual encounters.
There will also be a lot of waiting. While you might have been looking for a serious relationship, this might just be casual dating casual sex for your partner. The best thing is to not let this affect your life, and definitely don't change your relationship status.
RiskWhen you decide to participate in adult dating sites and it happens to be a married dating site, there are always risks that come with it. It doesn't matter if it is the best affair dating site or the online dating scene is better than expected, the risk of dating a married man or woman is high, especially because a part of married secrets.
The online user's spouse could think they are happily married without realizing that their partner is on these dating sites. When you are in a relationship with a married person someone is always at risk of getting hurt whether it's the wife, husband, or children.
To avoid risk, set boundaries and always make sure you are on the same page when it comes to these encounters.
Tips For Your First Meetup
Safety First
Meeting your hookup for the first time? Make sure to put your safety first and have a back up plan.
Don't think that because you met on the best married dating website that this person isn't dangerous or setting you up for failure.
Besides looking at their online dating website, make sure you are checking out their other online profiles. See who their friends and family are. Online daters can be sneaky, so communicate with them. If they are hesitant about you looking them up, then maybe it's best for you not to meet up.
Safety Tips For Online Dating
When connecting through an affair website or other dating website, it is important you think of your safety.
It is recommended that you use different photos for your married dating profile than you would for your local dating profiles or social media profiles. Look out for people looking for internet services, financial help, and even dating advice. Block and report these suspicious profiles.
Talking to someone new can be exciting and you want to let them know everything about you all at once, but when, but when you are on sites for married people, it is best to not share everything right away.
Before you decide you want to meet this user, make sure to video chat first. That way you can avoid any scary first time meetup panics.
Signs Your Partner May Be Cheating
CommunicationCommunication is one of the biggest things in a relationship that either makes it or breaks it. If you and your partner communicate very well and it starts dwindling, that is a huge red flag.
If you can't even get your spouse to fight with you, then you should know something is wrong.
Other communicative signs include:
- Partner ignores what you are saying completely
- Changes the subject
- Never answers questions or comes up with reasons they can't talk
- Stops saying I love you
- Appearance and Attitude Changes
Has your partner gone shopping or started taking extra good care of themselves? While change and devoting time to yourself is always a good thing, sometimes it can be a cause of concern.
Some things to look out for include noticing if your spouse is dressing nicer or has a sudden glow up in their appearance or even signs of your partner exhibiting low self-esteem. It is common for cheating partners to also become very critical of you and pick fights more often. If you suspect cheating or an affair and you ask, they seem defensive or don't give you a promising answer.
While there is never a definitive way to tell if your partner is cheating, understanding the signs will always help you catch them in the act.
Should You Have an Affair?
While having an affair be eventual and exciting, there are more pros and cons than many people realize.
ProsEgo Booster
Having an marital affair or any affair can have a huge positive boost in self confidence. When someone new is attracted to you, it can ensure some of that self doubt you could have been feeling or seeing before. You gain back your confidence and start seeing yourself differently in the mirror.
Libido Booster
Most of the time, affairs are about sex. After many years of marriage, sex can become an afterthought and is seen as a chore more so than enjoyable. Having an affair brings back the excitement of sex. You start feeling sexual again. You think about it during the day, and even in your dreams.
Cons EmotionalSpending time with someone always brings you closer, especially when it's sexual. This can be difficult in affairs and someone usually always ends up getting hurt.
Messy and Guilt
Eventually, the excitement of it all dwindles away and you are left with guilt and anxiety. You don't necessarily want to stop, but you also don't want to get caught. The lies you told before aren't working and your partner is starting to question you. You ask yourself again and again, if it is worth it.
Final Thoughts
If you are seeking excitement or change in your current relationship or marriage, you won't be disappointed with the amount of online married dating sites available to paid and free users. While searching for your next sexual adventure, make sure you are aware of all the pros and cons that come with it, and remember, safety first!